Hive Fleet Akyron
by DrakeTheDuelist
Summary: And going up against the cast of SK, we have Hive Fleet Akyron, the mightiest tabletop force this calendar year... is needing to be castrated so everybody can enjoy what it has to offer. Sorry, but my fic was good originally. You can read here to see if
1. Default Chapter

(A/N: Okay, the whole two people that have read this fic have thought it was very good. Problem is, I'm having trouble getting more reviewers when I post it on & Shaded Pathway. And after all I put into this fic, nobody reads it… Oh well, I'll post it here and risk the random flames and deletions that this site is famous for.

This takes place a little over 1 year of the anime. I know somebody's going to ask.

Just about every character makes an appearance or is mentioned at some point, though some of the less-than-observed characters were omitted for the sake of clarity and fluid motion of the fic. What happened to a lot of them will turn up in Part II (and this particular fic is I of III) of the entire HFA saga.

I own neither Shaman King nor Games Workshop's range of human and alien races wherever they make their appearances. But you all know the drill by now, as far as disclaimers go.

PLEASE, avoid the urge to flame this to the ground! I know that most who pay attention and can follow it will like this (or at least the original), but statistically speaking, somebody will flame this to the ground just to be a jerk. And if you're that jerk, I recommend you resist the urge, as I want as many readers to enjoy this as possible. I realize that this may be hard for some people though. (reminisces over the fall of Peer Pressure) However, I will spare _no_ expense in precautions for my fics.

Since I can't unfortunately post the original (the ratings don't go that high and I would never see any reviews), instead of prohibiting all of you from reading this, I'm just going to neuter it for a kiddie audience. (Oh crap… I've turned into an editor for 4Kids! This is _not_ going to look good to some of my fans of old…) However, hope is not lost. If you want to receive the original HFA, email me a message or post a review stating that you want to see the original, un-screwed with fic and I'll send out the originals. Unfortunately the rating on the originals is much higher than normal because of words like "poison", "the Far East", and "love". sarcastically How _dare_ I use such language and themes in an internet-posted fanfic…

Okay, I'm done ranting. Read on.)

Chapter 1: Discovery

It is a dark and stormy day around the Inn. Thunder cracks loudly, lightning illuminates the sky every so often, and the rain pours down the street in torrents. And all the while, the inhabitants, Yoh, Anna, and Morty, huddle around the TV in the living room…

_As you can clearly see, these rains are impairing travel all across the country. But what baffles meteorologists the most is the consistency of these storms throughout the countryside, as well as similar, though less severe weather patterns at other locations around the world. _The television shows disturbing footages of trees being torn from their roots by the torrential floods as the TV announcer continues dictating the misfortunate events as they occur.

Yoh and Morty stare at the television screen in complete awe, but Anna stares stoically at the events, showing no concern at all.

"Hmph, I can't believe they interrupted my soaps for _this_!" Anna comments snidely. "I never got to see whether Chad went out with Diana or not!" The frustrated blonde girl folds her arms crossly and stares at the television coldly, as if she could change the channel through intimidation.

Yoh and Morty continue to stare at the television like hypnotized zombies, jaws hanging wide open. The television continues to dictate.

Meteorologists have yet to come to the bottom of the source of this global hurricane, but attribute it to abnormally strong lunar-induced tides. No further explanation can be offered at thi-… The TV channel suddenly changes to a cheesy soap opera.

Chad, do you have feelings for me or not! A southern-accented female voice coming from the TV says.

Yoh and Morty turn back to see Anna crouched on the floor with the television remote in hand and a small bowl of popcorn at the side. "Stupid news. It always gets in the way of the best parts of my soaps…" Anna complains coldly.

Yoh and Morty glance at each other, and then slowly back away from the television, lest Anna shout at them for getting in the way.

Suddenly, a floating blue fireball with a cartoon-like face shoots through the opposite wall as if in a panic. "Master Yoh! Master Yoh!" Amidamaru chants as he approaches Yoh, Manta, and Anna.

The three all turn attentively to see what Amidamaru is panicking about.

"What is it, Amidamaru?" Yoh asks with a sense of urgency.

"And is it really so important that you have to interrupt me while watching my favorite soap opera?" Anna questions, her frustration building.

Amidamaru quickly materializes before the three, then points to the main corridor in a panic. "Someone is trying to come in, but cannot due to the floods outside! Master Yoh, we must assist!" Amidamaru states.

"I'm there!" Yoh says as he springs to his feet. He runs out of the room, and on his way out, he grabs a sheathed samurai sword that is perched near the door.

Morty follows quickly, or as quick as he can for someone his height. On the way out of the room, he grabs a small, red dagger that looks like it is made out of stone. "Hey, Yoh! Wait up! I'm coming too!" Morty calls down the hall.

Anna glances back as Yoh, Amidamaru, and Morty leave the room, then immediately returns her attention to the television set. "Let me know what happens!" Anna shouts as she picks up a popcorn kernel out of the bowl on the floor and tosses the small kernel into her mouth.

Yoh and Morty open the front door to see a short girl in a long, pink, hooded raincoat. She hangs onto the stone front entrance, the quickly flowing, waist-deep floodwaters nearly sweeping her off her feet. The girl lowers her hood and shouts towards the porch. "Yoh! Morty! Help, I'm gonna' get swept away! The current is too strong!" she calls.

"Tamara!" Yoh and Morty shout. The two boys glance around their flooded yard frantically, looking for some way to get Tamao through the torrential floods safely.

Thinking quickly, Yoh glances down at the sheathed sword in his hand, then to Amidamaru, who levitates beside Yoh and Morty, also looking around the flooded yard in shock. Yoh reaches out towards Amidamaru and configures him into a blue fireball, which he takes into his left hand. At the same time, Yoh kicks the sheath off the sword in his hand. Then, in one swift motion, he places Amidamaru into the base of the blade of the sword. "Amidamaru, Spirit Form, into the sword!" Yoh recites. The sword in Yoh's hand immediately begins bristling with bright blue furiyoku.

Catching on, Morty tosses the small red dagger up to Yoh. "Yoh, catch!"

Yoh catches the dagger that Morty throws up to him, and then he crosses the blades of the sword with the dagger. "Into the antiquity!" Yoh declares. The sword flows into the blade and causes it to grow long and thick. Yoh's sword turns into a gigantic, highly ornate blue-bladed sword that stretches high into the air. Yoh swings this giant sword down, slashing at the pool of water in the front yard. "Celestial Slash!" he declares. A red energy wave comes off the tip of the blade as Yoh swings it. As the energy wave strikes the surface of the water, the waters rush apart, exposing the dampened and muddy sidewalk stones in the yard leading up to the elevated porch.

Glancing around frantically, Tamara dashes in between the walls of parted waters and runs towards the porch. Around her, the waves of water begin to reach a peak and fall towards her. Not even halfway to the porch, she speeds into a futile run to escape the aquatic trash compactor. She reaches the porch as the water closes in around her, and Yoh and Morty frantically pull her out of the way of the waves. Tamara, Yoh, and Morty all collapse on the porch in heart-pounding anxiety, all three of them drenched from head to toe from the splashes of the giant waves.

Meanwhile, in the warm living room, Anna sits on her side and snarls at the television set again. The TV shows a radio tower icon with the letters "EBS" under it.

The TV remains mute for a few seconds, and then begins talking again. We now interrupt our current program, "Nanoseconds of Our Lives", to bring you this highly urgent announcement.

Anna sneers and holds up the remote control and flips through various channels. To her irritation, all of the channels appear to be playing the same exact message. "Ugh… I hope this is as urgent as they claim it is, for their sake…" Anna comments as she slams the remote down on the floor next to her.

We ask that all of you remain inside and do not go outside into the rain for any purposes until further notice. An analysis of the rainwater from the National Biological Analysis Center indicates that this rain contains trace particles of potentially hazardous spores. There is no word out yet as to what effect these spores have on human, animal, or plant tissue as of now. Please immediately seek dry shelter and do not leave to retrieve any property or pets. If you are currently outside, or have already gotten wet, seek shelter immediately, and then proceed to the nearest hospital or clinic in the area and seek treatment in between breaks in the storm. Repeat, we ask that all of you remain inside and do no-

Anna turns off the TV with the remote, then leafs through a nearby hotel magazine, muttering to herself. "Hmph… What a stupid warning… If you're already outside and getting wet, how are you supposed to watch TV to see the announcement that says not to go outside and get wet? There was no thought put into that warning whatsoever…"

"What did you say Anna?" Yoh responds from out of nowhere.

Anna tilts her head back and stands to her feet to see Yoh, Morty, and Tamara behind her, all three soaking wet. She recalls in her mind what the emergency announcement said about the rainwater being tainted. "…Uh-oh…" she mutters softly.

Anna paces around in a room, holding a cordless phone up to her ear. "What do you mean you're busy!" she shouts.

Faust holds up the phone on the other end by resting it between his chin and shoulder. His hands are full as he is almost literally juggling pill canisters and vaccination needles. A bony, green-glowing hand reaches out of his white lab coat and holds up the phone to Faust's ear. "I mean that we're busy, Mrs. Asakura. This epidemic is everywhere, and people are coming from miles away to my clinic, and I'm short on living hands and furiyoku at the moment."

Anna raises an eyebrow. "What does your furiyoku have to do with this?" she questions.

"Do you honestly think that anyone would believe that Eliza is my 'Assistant Nurse' if they could see through her?" Faust responds. He begins fumbling with the pill bottles and injection vials in his arms and all the items fall across the linoleum floor and roll away. "Rats…" he mutters. He then picks up the phone and holds it up to his ear. "Sorry about that, Mrs. Asakura, a slight complication with my coordination."

Anna stops pacing and anime-sighs. "Well whatever. How do I handle this… er… complication?"

Faust continues picking up the pill bottles off the floor, holding the phone in between his chin and shoulder while crawling around on his hands and knees. "It's not as complicated as the news report claims it to be. The water isn't lethal. I know because I accidentally swallowed some when trying to analyze it with my tongue."

Anna anime-sighs again. "Could we keep this on a need-to-know basis? Because that is something I didn't need to know."

Faust continues hunting around for fallen pill bottles. "I apologize. Anyway, you should take a hot bath or shower to clean off first. You live in an indoor spa, yes?"

Anna stares up in confusion. "Yeah, we live in a spa. Oh, and by the way it's not me, it's Yoh."

"Anyone else?" Faust asks.

Anna thinks to herself for a second. "Er… uh… nope, just Yoh. Yep, his miniature friend and that other girl are all perfectly dry, hehehe…" she says, then lowers the phone and anime-sighs yet again. "If word got out that I tried to help out anyone other than Yoh, I'd never hear the end of it…" she thinks to herself.

Faust doesn't notice the nervousness in Anna's voice. "It should be enough to get Yoh, Morty, and Tamara cleaned up. I was safe because I have a plethora of medications on hand. There's no telling what effects the rainwater will have on the others if not properly treated."

"Wait a sec… How'd you know about Morty and Tamara?" Anna questions.

"Of course, you don't spend your whole life studying medicine and not learn anything about psychology," Faust says.

"I hate it when you do that, you know…" Anna comments snidely.

"You're welcome, Mrs. Asakura. I know. Goodbye," Faust responds. He hangs up quickly.

Anna holds the phone up listening to the dial tone. "What a freak…" she says as she hangs the phone up.

(A/N: Okay, hope the castrations didn't have too much effect. Changing the names was a bit much though. I'll have to really bite my lip when Hao shows up… Zeke, pfft, somebody probably got fired for that… All done in the name of drawing in some of the lost and confused dub-viewers, of course.

Unfortunately, a lot was lost from Faust. I hear he's a really good interpretation in the original HFA. Remember though, if you want to receive the original HFA, contact me via email or review, but either way, leave an email address and I'll add you to my mailing list.

Viva la… er, my fanfic!)


	2. Chapter 2: Creeping Sounds

(A/N: Man, castrating this chapter is going to eliminate some of the coolest stuff in the early parts in the fic… sniff, sniff I'll manage… No blood & gore sucks…

I don't own anything here, and not even the big monster. Though I do own a 3" replica, I have no copyright over the pieces I made it with.)

Chapter 2: Creeping Scouts

Yoh, Morty, and Tamara stand outside the door to the indoor segment of the spa, all three wearing the same white bathrobe (Manta's robe being a trimmed-down one so he doesn't trip over it), getting ready to take a bath as Anna had previously instructed.

Taking the first turn, Tamara meekly enters into the steaming spa room.

Anna shuts the door after Tamara enters in, and then glares down at Morty. "Hey, half-pint, go get my cell phone! I need to make a call to the doctor on what to do next."

After recovering from a frozen state due to Anna's killer stare, Morty backs away slowly and around the corner, not wanting to give Anna any fodder to yell at him about. Morty disappears around the corner.

Yoh glances back to see that Morty has gone around the corner, and then returns his stare to Anna. "Okay _now_ we can talk. So what's really going on here? It's too early in the week for your 'Shaman King's Hygiene' lecture, " Yoh comments.

Anna shoots a piercing stare at Yoh. "Is it too much to ask that I require you to keep clean? You were just outside, playing in the rain of a typhoon, and you could've caught a cold. Now I want you to take a hot bath. It's only a logical fever-reduction treatment," Anna explains.

Yoh only grins back at her with his signature goofy grin. "Anna, you can tell me. What's _really_ going on?" Yoh asks. "Everybody knows enough about a fever without having to call a doctor to know what to do…"

Anna lowers her head and sighs. "I want you to know…" she begins meekly. She then tilts her head around to shoot Yoh a fatal glare. "I want you to know that playing out in a rainstorm this powerful is a stupid idea!" Anna shouts.

Almost blasted away by Anna's shouting, Yoh backs away a few steps in recoil.

The two remain in this position, with Anna snarling at Yoh, and Yoh trying to back away, where they remain in a frozen silence, until...

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" a girl's voice screams from inside the spa room.

Yoh stares at the closed door in concern. "That was Tammy's scream!" he says as he strikes a defensive posture, half-expecting something monstrous to pop right out of the door. He grabs his sword, which he leaned against the wall as a safety precaution, and unsheathes it quickly.

Anna stares at Yoh. "You doofus, put that away! You carry that thing all the time, and use it for everything, like just this morning, when you used it to cut your bagel!" She stares back at the door, showing the slightest hint of concern as to what made Tamara scream. "I'm gonna' get rid of whatever that thing is that spooked Tamara here and now. And don't you _dare_ try to follow me…" Anna declares as she takes her prayer beads into her hands and walks into the spa room. She shuts the door forcefully after entering.

Yoh holds his sword tightly in his hands, ready to spring into action. "Amidamaru," he calls.

Amidamaru suddenly appears beside Yoh. "Master Yoh, something is indeed in there. I can sense it. Why do you not go in to assist Anna?"

Yoh bites his lip. "What! Do you _honestly _think that I'm going to go against Anna's instructions?" he responds uncomfortably.

Amidamaru is perplexed. "It wouldn't have been the first time…" he says.

"I know," Yoh responds as he stares at the wall on the other side of the hall, where several hooks hold up several bathrobes of similar color scheme.

Anna walks through the humid room with her prayer beads held out. She occasionally shakes them to attempt to track any spirits hiding in the thick steam. She looks around the room nervously, as if she can feel something that is neither a ghost, nor visible to the human eye. "Ponchi, Konchi, did you two learn a new trick?" Anna questions, sounding confident that nothing threatening was in the steam. Her prayer beads shake themselves towards the right, and Anna shoots a glance in that direction. Though unable to see anything, she can spot 'cuts' in the fog as something is apparently moving through it very quickly. Something huge…

Anna continues walking through the steam, towards the direction of the movement. Having come to where the source of the moving came from, she can feel something on the ground at her feet. She stoops down on one knee to try and find whatever was on the ground. As her eyes adjust to being able to see through the dense humidity, she can make out the object, and gasps.

Tamara lays facedown on the stone floor. She appears to have fainted at the sight of something that startled her.

Thinking quickly, Anna turns Tamara on her back so that she faces up and then pats her lightly on the cheeks to attempt to resuscitate her. "Tamara, what happened here?" Anna grills her. After getting no response, she then strikes Tamara across the cheeks in what would be more Anna-like of a cheek-slap. Tamara does not come to. Building frustration, Anna raises her right hand high into the air and then slaps her across the face with an even stronger follow through.

Tamara finally regains consciousness, but struggles to keep her eyes open. "It's here… it's here…" she whispers under her breath.

Anna looks up frantically to see the 'cuts' in the fog moving in a direction that closes in on her position. "Yeah, yeah, it's here, I could've figured that part out by myself. _What's_ here is what I want to know. Did you see anything?"

"It's here!" Tamara squeaks. She nearly faints again, but Anna strikes her on the cheek once more for good measure. "Ow! …I… I don't know… it-it-it all happened so fast… I just blacked out, and that's all I remember…" Tamara squeaks softly. "…Miss Anna… please make the big animal go away…" she cries weakly.

"That's _Mrs. Asakura _to you!" Anna shouts at Tamara. She then glares up, her eyes fixed on where she thinks the attacker is by which way the steam moves. She hears a light clicking, similar to the noise made when horse hooves trot on concrete, but softer. She continues staring straight ahead, but the steam suddenly stops moving, like whatever was moving in there had stopped. As far as Anna could tell, the thing stopped right in front of her, though she still could not see it. She can barely distinguish between the flow of air in the room and the exhaling of this invisible creature in front of her. The feeling of the moving air on her neck becomes slightly more noticeable, as the beast apparently approaches closer.

"Celestial Slash!" a voice declares loudly. A flying red sword slash moves through the air and makes impact with the creature that approaches Anna, and the creature hisses and snarls.

Immediately after impact, the creature flickers in visibility, then disappears again. It apparently slams into a wooden pillar.

Anna takes her glare off the monster and looks behind her, where the red slash originated. "Yoh! What are you doing in here! Didn't I tell you to stay out!" Anna shouts.

Yoh walks through the fog. "Is that the thanks I get for rescuing you?" Yoh remarks. His silhouette comes into more detail as Yoh approaches. Yoh had taken a black sash from one of the robes outside the room and tied it over his eyes like a blindfold. He holds up his sword, sporting full Spirit Control as he grins widely. "I can't see you from behind this blindfold anyway, if that's what you're worried about," Yoh adds.

Anna frowns. "You're just lucky I'm preoccupied right now, or I'd beat some sense into you right here and now for disobeying a direct order," she says with an ominous calmness.

"Master Yoh! Master Yoh!" a voice says. "Master Yoh, my apologies, but I lost track of the beast," Amidamaru continues.

Yoh turns his head around the room pointlessly, forgetting that he had a blindfold on. He turns his nose up at the air and takes a whiff of the humid air. "Whoo-weee, what's that smell!" Yoh complains as he places a hand over his nose. Suddenly, he is sent hurtling across the room and crashes into a wooden pillar. Yoh's Spirit Control breaks as Amidamaru appears beside him.

"Master Yoh, be careful!" Amidamaru warns. "This creature is too silent to track with auditory means, it is invisible in body, and by the time you can feel it, it's too late. Do you have any ideas?"

Yoh gets up off the ground, and then channels Amidamaru back into Harusame with his free hand. "Well as far as I can tell, its breath smells worse than my gym socks, so that's a start," Yoh notes. "If you see anything suspicious, let me know," he adds.

Amidamaru's face appears on the furiyoku-enhanced scabbard of the sword Yoh holds. He opens his eyes and glances around the steam-filled room. "There is too much steam in this room, and the fact that the assailant is invisible really doesn't help the situation either…" Amidamaru states.

Anna carries Tamao off the ground and throws her arm around Tamao's shoulder to try to get her to walk. She continues to stare at Yoh and Amidamaru as they stand in place, looking for the creature in whatever means they can.

Tamara is only barely conscious at this point. "I'm scared… It's gonna' get us… There's nothing we can do to it if we can't even see it…" she drones on, still dazed from having fainted.

"Oh, grow up! It's only a wind sprite! It may be a bit on the big and muscular side, but it's still only a sprite," Anna yells at Tamao.

Tamara smiles as she begins to fall unconscious again. "Thanks Miss Anna, I could really go for a Sprite right about now myself," she drones on drowsily.

Anna anime-sighs deeply. "Why me?" she says to herself.

"Master Yoh, can you sense anything?" Amidamaru asks.

Yoh nods his head back and forth. "Nope. You?" he responds.

"I can see nothing," Amidamaru states.

Yoh snaps his fingers in frustration. "Aw man, that thing's probably long gone! We probably already knocked it down and then it started running scared like a… AAA!" Yoh falls on his back and is being dragged by his bare ankle towards the center of the room.

The creature finally comes to visibility. It has the appearance of a twelve-foot tall praying mantis-like creature. All but the most obvious details were a blur because the creature could move with such sophisticated reflexes. Two giant arms with curved claws come out of its shoulders and point up. Its middle legs are replaced by hand-like claws, one of these claws picks Yoh up by the ankle and lifts him into the air.

"Found it!" Yoh and Amidamaru both yell.

Anna carries a now unconscious Tamara out of the room, but stops as she sees Yoh being dragged by the now visible creature. She stares at the repulsive figure of the giant insect with a sneer. "Ooookay… that is the _ugliest_ wind sprite I've ever seen…" she states as she carelessly tosses Tamara off her shoulders and takes hold of her prayer beads again.

The creature grabs Yoh by the torso and turns him right-side up. The creature holds Yoh over the now boiling water that would've been Tamara's bath water, but without the heater having been turned off, the water begins to boil.

Yoh tries to squirm out of the grip of the monster, but the creature overpowers him easily. He drops the sword to the ground and bobs his head to try and throw off his blindfold. The hot, steaming breath of the creature blows the blindfold off his head completely, allowing Yoh to stare up at the creature that is ready to dump him into the boiling tub. He attempts to weasel his head away from the creature's noxious breath. "Whoa, you are soooo smelly…" Yoh comments, nearly fainting from the stench of the creature's breath.

The creature rears back its scythe-like arms, ready to slam Yoh into the boiling water in an instant, but as it rears its claws just a little further back a blue necklace lassoes around the two claws and holds them back.

With inhuman strength, Anna holds onto the other end of her prayer bead necklace, pulling with all her body weight. With a sharp jerk, the creature loses its balance and falls backwards. The creature's grip immediately weakens and Yoh drops to the ground in front of it.

Anna leans over the stunned creature's face and wraps her prayer beads around its neck a couple of times. The creature hisses back at her as it slowly comes to. Anna stares into its primal, bloodthirsty eyes with unbelievable courage and sneers at it. "Listen up, you freak of nature! You don't get to lay a _finger_ on Yoh, because punishing him is _my_ job!" she insists. With her added leverage and volatile temperament, Anna violently kicks the creature in the jaw with her wooden sandal and its head snaps back. The creature's rapid motions and frantic squirming stop as it falls unconscious.

Yoh climbs to his feet and grins happily at Anna. "Hey Anna-chan, awesome kick!" Yoh comments.

Anna leers back at Yoh. "How could you let something so puny run amok?" she asks Yoh. "Oh and by the way…" she adds, then she whips Yoh in the face with a black sash, and then holds it up for Yoh to see. "It's not the blindfold that matters, but it's that you broke a direct order of mine!" she shouts as she throws the sash back at Yoh.

Yoh stares up at Anna in shock. "Er… well… yeah… I mean what would've happened if I didn't come in and distract the creature?" Yoh says in defense.

Anna glares back at Yoh with even more depth. "Nothing would've happened! I'm the one who knocked it out, and all you'd have to do is to dump it back in the forest where it belongs before it regains consciousness, so I don't think you deserve any medals for extraordinary combat," she says to Yoh.

Amidamaru appears at Yoh's side. "Mistress Anna has a point," he comments.

Yoh glances at Amidamaru. "Hey, whose side are you on anyway?" Yoh asks.

(A/N: AAGH! I can't take this! I'm perverting my own fanfiction for reviews! What low level of ignominy have I stooped to! Unconsciousness? Fainting? Boiling water? Please, you all _know_ what that bug was going to do to Yoh… I had to practically rewrite the chapter just to screw it up enough so that more people will read it.

I beg of you that you not ask me to continue this horror of a fic in this way. If you want to see the rest of the fic, ask for it sent to you via email, where no one else can flame it.)


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